the Deal regarding the Hijaab..
I read this article about a sister's decision on embracing the hijaab or what malaysians would call 'tudung'. Click on the link to read it..
Making the Decision to Wear Hejab
Reading this brought me back to the memories of myself when i decided to cover my head..
I come from a pretty secular family, and wearing the hijaab was never an issue for us. My aunties do wear it, but we didn't. I remember when i entered MRSM (junior sc college) at 16, which i wanted to, i didn't know that it was compulsory to wear 'tudung'..i seriously almost wanted to go for registration 'bare-headed', but thanks to my sister who enlightened me on the rules written in the discipline book, i wore it that day. It was a new white school 'tudung', still smelled synthetic and not even ironed! I dread thinking of my self-image at that time...Anyhow, in the early days in MRSM, i still remember my friends (who r already experts at wearing them) sulking in frustration at the condition of my 'tudung'..i absolutely had no idea how to wear it properly!..and it wasn't after a few weeks before i realized that i need to iron it before i wear it! And my inner scarf (anak tudung) would always be sitting so low on my eyebrows..oh God, fashion victim indeed!
During the first semester, i didn't even consider wearing 'tudung' outside of MRSM..then one day..i went back home and went out to town with my sister. We went into this photo shop, after a while a few of my seniors suddenly appeared in front of the shop, standing there for quite a while waiting for their friends..I quickly sneaked behind one of the photocopy machines and hid there until they were gone..hahaha it was so funny. My sister couldn't help laughing at me non-stop..in fact she still teases me about that until now..
Feeling terrified of meeting seniors outside school was one thing that motivated me to wear the 'tudung' back then..what a reason huh?? Well i was naive..In semester 2, i started wearing scarves when i went home for the holidays..afraid of meeting the seniors was one thing, but there was also another inexplicable reason for that sudden need to cover my head. Maybe it was that i felt more comfortable doing so, felt more protected...Maybe it was Allah who helped me feel that way.
The first time i wore a 'tudung' when going out, my mum was surprised. 'Why do you need to wear that?' i remember her asking. I only replied..'I just feel more comfortable covering my head, cos i do it all the time in MRSM'..which was quite true, frankly.
From then on, i never turned back. Of course, i didn't start off wearing the 'tudung' the proper way..but i gradually improved on it (including remembering to iron it first!)..Altho' my first reason/niat for doing so was not exactly right, it doesn't really matter cos i wanted to do it on my own will, and Allah has shown me the true meaning of holding on to this practice..for the sake of His orders, for Islam's dignity, as walking examples of Islam (that's what Aliya told me)..
Well, i hope Allah will not let me deter from the right path..wearing the 'tudung' is only one thing, there's a zillion more things i need to learn about this wonderful way of life.
"Our Lord! Condemn us not if we forget or fall into error; our Lord! Lay not on us a burden Like that which Thou didst lay on those before us; Our Lord! Lay not on us a burden greater than we have strength to bear. Blot out our sins, and grant us forgiveness. Have mercy on us. Thou art our Protector; Help us against those who stand against faith." (2:286)
Reading this brought me back to the memories of myself when i decided to cover my head..
I come from a pretty secular family, and wearing the hijaab was never an issue for us. My aunties do wear it, but we didn't. I remember when i entered MRSM (junior sc college) at 16, which i wanted to, i didn't know that it was compulsory to wear 'tudung'..i seriously almost wanted to go for registration 'bare-headed', but thanks to my sister who enlightened me on the rules written in the discipline book, i wore it that day. It was a new white school 'tudung', still smelled synthetic and not even ironed! I dread thinking of my self-image at that time...Anyhow, in the early days in MRSM, i still remember my friends (who r already experts at wearing them) sulking in frustration at the condition of my 'tudung'..i absolutely had no idea how to wear it properly!..and it wasn't after a few weeks before i realized that i need to iron it before i wear it! And my inner scarf (anak tudung) would always be sitting so low on my eyebrows..oh God, fashion victim indeed!
During the first semester, i didn't even consider wearing 'tudung' outside of MRSM..then one day..i went back home and went out to town with my sister. We went into this photo shop, after a while a few of my seniors suddenly appeared in front of the shop, standing there for quite a while waiting for their friends..I quickly sneaked behind one of the photocopy machines and hid there until they were gone..hahaha it was so funny. My sister couldn't help laughing at me non-stop..in fact she still teases me about that until now..
Feeling terrified of meeting seniors outside school was one thing that motivated me to wear the 'tudung' back then..what a reason huh?? Well i was naive..In semester 2, i started wearing scarves when i went home for the holidays..afraid of meeting the seniors was one thing, but there was also another inexplicable reason for that sudden need to cover my head. Maybe it was that i felt more comfortable doing so, felt more protected...Maybe it was Allah who helped me feel that way.
The first time i wore a 'tudung' when going out, my mum was surprised. 'Why do you need to wear that?' i remember her asking. I only replied..'I just feel more comfortable covering my head, cos i do it all the time in MRSM'..which was quite true, frankly.
From then on, i never turned back. Of course, i didn't start off wearing the 'tudung' the proper way..but i gradually improved on it (including remembering to iron it first!)..Altho' my first reason/niat for doing so was not exactly right, it doesn't really matter cos i wanted to do it on my own will, and Allah has shown me the true meaning of holding on to this practice..for the sake of His orders, for Islam's dignity, as walking examples of Islam (that's what Aliya told me)..
Well, i hope Allah will not let me deter from the right path..wearing the 'tudung' is only one thing, there's a zillion more things i need to learn about this wonderful way of life.
"Our Lord! Condemn us not if we forget or fall into error; our Lord! Lay not on us a burden Like that which Thou didst lay on those before us; Our Lord! Lay not on us a burden greater than we have strength to bear. Blot out our sins, and grant us forgiveness. Have mercy on us. Thou art our Protector; Help us against those who stand against faith." (2:286)
posted by *mardhatillah* @ 8:10 PM
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